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"The rush you get from public sex is never as good as the possible consequences"
"I 'fainted' while hooking up because it was that bad. My one night stand was a doctor apparently..."
"I owe so much money on my taxes this year that for a second, I actually debated sleeping with people for money."
“Some people have lives; some people have PANDORA.”
"The one night stand I had two weeks before was our waiter"
"He complimented himself more than he complimented me"
"I wish so badly that I didn't wear my heart on my sleeve"
"It's not the best marriage ever, but we're still hanging in here"
"Me and my best friend are now enemies"
“I once let a cop give me a foot massage to get out of a ticket. People are into some weird stuff…"
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